Josiah's thoughts on heaven

For several months now Josiah has been fascinated by death and heaven. I know, I know, it's strange, but he asks all the time what's going to happen when he dies. It's my fault. He told me that he was going to love Maggie, our dog, forever and ever. I had to go and open my big mouth and point out that someday Maggie would die. I wish I'd kept my big mouth shut!!!

So last week Josiah was talking and talking until I asked him to be quiet for a few minutes. When I told him that he could talk again we had the following conversation:

"When I die and go to heaven can I talk?" he asked.

"Yes," I replied.

"To God?"

"Yes."

"Yeah," he yelled, clapping his hand and jumping up and down. "I love God. Him is my best friend in Heaven. When I die I going to sing Holy, Holy, Holy with Him."

On of THOSE Mothers

Okay, I have a confession to make. Somehow in the last few months I've become one of Those mothers. I always said I would never be one of Them. They were the kind of mothers that I would never be!

It started quite innocently. Things were actually pretty good around here. Josiah had gone through a period of open defiance and we'd come through on the other side. There were very, very few temper tantrums and overall things were pretty calm. In short, life was good. That's when it happened. I let my guard down. I underestimated the level of craftiness that could come from a just turned three year old little boy. Open defiance had been replaced by a more quiet form of disobedience.

A few weeks ago we were listening to a pod cast of Family Life Today. It's a great radio broadcast with lots of good advice on marriage and parenting. They were speaking with an author, Ginger Plowman, about her book Don't Make Me Count to Three. When I heard the subject I was feeling pretty good about myself and my parenting. I was thinking that this program might make me feel better about my parenting. Boy, was I wrong.

What I realized as I listened to her talk was that even though I wasn't physically counting to three I was doing the same thing with my mannerisms. I was one of those mothers. God really used this program to convict me that I wasn't doing what I should. Here's an example.

It's Friday morning. We're leaving at 9:30 for the park. At 9:15 I say "Josiah, go put on your shoes."

There is no response. Josiah is busy playing with his trains and doesn't want to be bothered. It's not that he hasn't heard, he just doesn't want to, yet.

"Josiah," I say a little more sternly, "Go put on your shoes, NOW."

This time he looks up from his trains. You can almost picture his thoughts. Sure, he needs to obey, but he has a few minutes yet.

"I can't find them," he says, looking around innocently.

"There under your table where they always are. Go get them and put them on. Make sure they're on the correct feet this time."

By now my voice has taken on a definite pitch and volume that lets him know that it is time to start taking some action. He gets up from his trains, gets his shoes and starts to put them on. Then he hears the dog scratching at the door.

"I go let Maggie in," he says, jumping up from the floor and racing to the door.

"Don't worry about Maggie, get your shoes on or else!" I yell, not even pretending to keep my voice down any more.

At this point Josiah starts crying, but puts his shoes on. I let in the dog, who seems bewildered by all the commotion.

Josiah comes out from his room with his shoes on the wrong feet. Why, because he likes them on the wrong feet. Not in the mood for another battle, and since it's ten minutes since we were supposed to leave, I give up and load him in the car. Of course, loading in the car is a battle on its own.

So we're listening to this woman talk about not scolding your children but speaking to them in a calm and serious voice. Hmm...I haven't been doing to well at that. Then she talks about how they obey, that they should be obeying the first time they're asked. Hmm...not doing to well there, either. Then she says how they should obey, with a joyful heart. Okay, okay, I get the point!

We immediately started teaching Josiah a saying. "Obey right away, all the way, and with a joyful heart!" When Josiah isn't doing what I tell him to do I ask, "Are you obeying or disobeying." Then I have him say the saying. If he's obeying, but with a rebellious spirit I ask him if he has a joyful heart. He'll put on a smily pretty quickly!

I started paying careful attention when I give Josiah a command. I make sure that he's looking at me and tell him exactly what to do, usually on his level. I then expect him to do it immediately with no whining. The first few days were pretty hard. It was painful for me to resist the urge to yell and replace it with a calm, quite voice. But it's getting better. On the second day I "yelled" at Dan to get it out of my system. I said "I've got to yell! Argh!!!" He laughed.

This week things have been better again. I think it's mostly that I have to be consistent and not get so wrapped up in my own thoughts that I don't pay enough attention to what's going on around me. I've heard it called "intentional" parenting.

I'm know I'll have my slip ups, but I'm going to keep trying not to be one of Those mothers!

Saving Money Part one

Some ladies and I were talking last night about ways to save money. I've read several articles recently about ways to save money, but lots of the ideas were impractical or not feasible for my family. I thought I'd list a few of the practical ways that we're trying to save money, and maybe a few money savings ideas that didn't work!

Today I'll share some ideas for saving money at restaurants. These may be obvious, but sometimes obvious ideas are the best.

1. Drink water! I ordered a soda for the first time in a long time the other day and was shocked when it added 2.25 plus tax to the bill! I can go to my corner gas station and get 5 sodas for that price! (See #5)

2. Split meals. Dan and I almost always split a meal. It's better for our wallet and our waist lines! The few times we don't split I usually end up wishing that I had ordered what he has anyway. He always picks the best things.

3. Eat off the kids menu, when possible. Not everyone lets you do this, but if they do it's a great way to get a good meal. They often come with a drink, too. Cracker Barrel and Moe's Southwest are the best places to do this. MMmmm....I'm feeling the urge for a Moo, Moo Mr. Cow!

4. Eat out on kids eat free night if you have kids. We went to Applebee's on Wed. and got a cheeseburger, fries, kids chicken fingers, applesauce, a kid's tea and a kid's ice cream sundae. The total tab was about 12 dollars after tip. We even brought a chicken finger home for Josiah's lunch the next day.

5. Check with school kids for discount cards or coupon books. The schools here sell Smart Cards for $10.00 that have discounts for various restaurants, gas stations, and are attractions. We have a card that lets you buy a large fry and drink at McDonalds and you get any sandwich for free. We get this and split it (See #2). It also has any size soft drink from a local gas station for 49 cents.

6. Buy an Entertainment book. This one doesn't work quite so well for us because we live an hour from the city that the Entertainment book is for. It's too far to drive for a quick dinner out. It is also for places that are more expensive than where we usually go. However, we wait to order ours until it is several months old. By then they usually send us emails offering a discounted price, free shipping, extra coupons...anything to get you to buy the book. By the time we order it we usually only have to use it once for it to pay for itself. I like it because it has attractions, too. We try to go to at least one historic attraction in the area each year.

There are just a few ideas. I'd love to hear other ideas.

Next I'll write about saving money on laundry! Stay tuned!!! :-)

Who says a 2 year old's too young for singing school!

Yesterday I had to go to the doctor. It was my second visit in a week. Last week Josiah and I were both miserably sick. He had a sinus infection and I had bronchitis. Josiah's almost completely better, but I'm not feeling very good. So, off we went to the Dr. again. They put is in the pediatric room so Josiah could play while the doctor saw me. It sounded like a good idea, but Josiah turned over 4 puzzles with LOTS of pieces all over the floor. The doctor and nurse could hardly get to me!

One of the puzzles was a shape puzzle. I heard Josiah singing, but wasn't sure what he was doing. He had all of the shapes in a vertical line and was singing do mi so while pointing at the shapes. It was pretty funny. He pointed to the triangle for do, too...pretty cool! I guess going to two singing schools this summer has payed off.

I had just told him to put one of the puzzles up before he dropped it when the doctor came in. She started right in to talk to me while Josiah saw the opportunity to ignore me.
I turned to the doctor and said "Excuse me, just a moment, please. I need to take care of this." Josiah was sad that he didn't get away with it, but he obeyed.

"He's so sweet!" the doctor said.

"Yes, but we work hard to keep him that way!" I replied.